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    The Angry Birds Movie

    Reviewed by
    adamwatchesmovies@

    As I walked into the theater to see “The Angry Birds Movie”, I reflected back on other video game-based films. Ever since “Super Mario Brothers”, we’ve been waiting for that adaptation that is not only faithful to the original source material but also actually respectable as a film. We’re still waiting. Is this a film? No. “The Angry Birds Movie” is nowhere as near as horrific as say… “Hitman” or “Max Payne” but there’s nothing about this app-based animated picture that says “theatrical release”.

    Red (voiced by Jason Sudeikis) is a cynical, bitter and angry bird that doesn’t get along with any of the other birds on the island. When pigs, led by Leonard (Bill Hader), suddenly appear, he’s the only one that suspects they might not be as friendly as they say. Red convinces two other anger management class students, Chuck (Josh Gad) and Bomb (Danny McBride) to help him investigate.

    The most surprising thing about “The Angry Birds Movie” is how many bird and pig puns it contains. Once I realized this was what the film’s arsenal consisted of I thought “Hog all the puns you want, but toucan play at this game! You’re not going to tweet me to any good writing, but at least eventually you’ll run out and then bring in the bacon, right?! ” But they keep coming. If “Early Bird Worms”, “Something Pig is coming” or “Ham Radio”, doesn’t sound funny to you, your theater seat will be reduced to a smoldering crater within 5 minutes. It’s not even a selective barrage of puns either. At one point, the birds say, “Last one there’s a rotten egg! ” Is that like me saying “The Last one there is a still-born fetus”?

    “Angry Birds” is unmistakeably a video game-based movie. You can tell by the incredibly thin plot. I lost track of how many scenes consist of characters spontaneously breaking into a dance just to pad out the running time. This story could’ve been condensed into a 22-minute episode of a television show if you exed the subplot characters and cut out the pop songs. There’s nothing here that’s memorable or inventive. If you take your children to see this film they won’t learn anything and I doubt they’ll cherish the memory years from now. It becomes downright desperate by throwing in pop culture references that there’s no way the intended audience will understand (How many of your kids have seen “The Shining”?) and then tosses in cheap fart and piss jokes. First “Pixels”, then “The Boss” and now this film? It confirms my theory that if Peter Dinklage is in a comedy, it’s guaranteed to suck.

    In the theater watching “Norm of the North”, I quickly started looking for something to slash my own wrists with. Here the thought never occurred to me, so let me tell you a few good things about the film. Firstly, it looks terrific. There are a lot of details in the characters and the backgrounds. The movements and animation are always fluid. It’s all very bright and lively. Sure the background jokes are dedicated to animal puns, but at least the screen is packed, there’s always something neat to look at. I also thought the 3D was well handled, particularly in the scenes that imitate the video game that inspired the film. There are funny moments here and there and even if it’s somewhat disheartening to see what is essentially a commercial on the big screen, it’s watchable. I just wish they could’ve tried harder. Some songs here aren’t even suited to the film, they’re just Internet popular. Is it too much to ask for the animators to pass on the opportunity to have every single critter dance? You could’ve spent that time developing your characters, making this something special instead! Think of the opportunity you missed out on, you could’ve been the first good theatrically released video game movie!

    In 2016, we need to demand more from films aimed at children than “The Angry Birds Movie”. Yeah, it looks terrific, but that’s the norm now and with this level of writing, I just can’t back it. I can’t really recommend the Angry Birds’ premiere on the big screen but I’ll give it this: it’s much better than I thought it was going to be. If you’re such a hardcore fan that you will disregard my criticism, at least do yourself a favor and see it in 3D. It’s one of the spots where “The Angry Birds Movie” shines. (3D theatrical version on the big screen, May 26, 2016)

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    adamwatchesmovies@  4.6.2016 age: 26-35 2,867 reviews

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