King Kong vs. Godzilla

To get audiences fired up for “Kong: Skull Island”, a number of giant monster films have been briefly re-released in the theater. “Pacific Rim”, 2014’s “Godzilla”, 2005’s “King Kong” and now, “King Kong vs. Godzilla”. I get what they were going for, but if they were going to show off a classic Godzilla or Kong movie… couldn’t they pick one that was good?

 Spoiler alert - click to reveal textMr. Tako (Ichirō Arishima) dispatches two of his employees to find Faro Island's legendary monster and bring it back to Japan to promote his company. When Sakurai (Tadao Takashima) and Kinsaburo (Yu Fujiki) attempt to bring back King Kong, the ape escapes and makes a straight line for Godzilla, in a battle for the ages.

Some films have dated special effects. “King Kong vs. Godzilla” has bad special effects. Even in 1962, the blue-screens would’ve been unconvincing and the costumes laughable. It makes you wonder if the people responsible for the design of Kong have ever even seen a gorilla. While I can excuse some of the questionable miniatures (even though we’ve seen better-looking ones in films made both before and after), there’s no excuse for the lame puppets used to show the titular titans from a distance or the obviously fake soldiers on the model ships.

If at least the script was any good.  Spoiler alert - click to reveal textWhat we have here is simply an excuse to bring two monsters together, interlaced with non-science that makes absolutely no sense and an equally ridiculous plot about hapless explorers. We’re told by so-called expert Dr. Arnold Johnson (Harry Holcombe) that Godzilla is likely to avoid electrical current because he’s a reptile. Don't all animals avoid getting shocked? But wait, according to this scholar, high voltage will empower Kong. How would anyone know this? Are we really supposed to believe that Kong has an advantage over the fire-breathing, radioactive dinosaur because of his larger brain? They’re not playing chess; they’re fighting to the death!

Nonetheless, I must admit that I have some affection for this picture. I can’t pin down why. The plot was re-worked to much greater effect two years later in “Mothra vs. Godzilla”, one of the strongest entries in the Godzilla cannon. No matter how much you squint, the film still looks lousy and there are very few good/memorable scenes. Even with the light tone and abundant comic relief, it’s largely embarrassing. Perhaps the original Japanese version is better, though viewing that cut would eliminate the endless (and unintentionally hilarious) scenes of American scientists talking about stuff they appear to be making up on the spot, a highlight for me.

“King Kong vs. Godzilla” is a low point in both the characters’ careers. At the same time, I keep coming back to it. It’s a bad movie, but I have a soft spot for “King Kong vs. Godzilla”. (American version on the big screen, March 5, 2017)