In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale

WARNING: This review is hidden because it reveals the content of the film.
Click here to show this review. Hmmm... well, I thought it could better... much better... but nope. As I predicted, this movies was a mix of "Lord of the ring" and " Enter the Dragon featuring Bruce Lee" and Revenge of the Nija. First of all, Jason Statham was very good in his role... but I dont think we should give him another Hero "Epic" movie-like... I mean... aiight... he go charisma... he look focused when he fight... but... you dont do "MUAY THAY" moves and KICKBOXING or NINJITSU in a Epic story... pls... never... do you imagine Bruce Lee In Harry Potter doing flips and round house kicks to all the Wizard out there? No... pls no... UNLESS... it's about a the story of a Martial Art Hero's imaginary Dreams... now "that"... I would understand... but this... was supposed to be a "serious" Epic story with a Wizard (a Mage if you wish) who supposedly wants to Conquer the world with sort-of-a-orcs look alike that they call "Krugs" (I'd say "Frogs" by the look of it) but anyways, the fighting scene were a little poor in the forest... I mean..., there supposed to be 3 LEGIONS of army ( the good ones) fighting the enemy there... but looking closely at the army itself... they look more like... 20... or 24 fightings... I mean, I dont know man... you want to have the feeling that there are alot of peeps fighting out there... not just a pickle of solder... I know you can't fit in 2000 peeps in one screen, but, it's all about the camera view perspective and the way you manage the video settings for each scene... I mean, I aint a movie producer, but when you look at lord of the ring, Peter Jackson manage to change scene by scene where each scene look likes a 10 000 soldier and ennemies battle field... ya know... anyways... and the KING was there... oh please... where were his Legion accompanying him? "pouf"... disappeared... we only Mostly see Jason Statham and the General fighting along side... and that's it... oh yea... and about the costume... I mean, cmon... it could of been better... the monster aint even scary... I mean, I feel like it was a Halloween Costume Party man... anyways, as for the Women (Elves supposed to be perhaps) I was expecting MORE then just VINES balancing from left to right and sliding down the vines... I mean, looked more like "Striptease" pole dancers (And I think they were in real life... Jesus Christ...) ok... first of all, apart from her boobs (the forest woman leader which was the only interest thing to watch) nothing was really impressive for her role... oh man... she was supposed to help the Hero at the end but... the only help she provides is sooo... sooo... sooo... lame... I wont tell you what she did... but My God... I thought she was gonna bring her whole (supposed to be alot of women elves) army to fight along side against the enemy and the Mage with special weapons and arrows and special Forest Warriors with a gigantesque special PLAN or something like that... but nooo... oh my lord... th 5 next minute after this was so... so... oh my god... dont even know how to say this... all she did was... (hmmm... go watch and see... you'll start to laugh) was nothing after all... all that "Hey, me and my chicks are kick some butt today with you... ( ya... sure...) the only butt kicking I guess was nothing else but BUTT-WALKING... oh man, you'll see what I mean... anyways, very disappointed with her role... like I say, all they did is showed they're boobs... so lame... what's next... hmmm... oh yea... haha! The King's nephew (that guy who plays in Scoobie doo: The movie) was so... so... so not his role in this movie... I mean... cmonnn... this guys ruined the whole movie man... yes he's good in comedy movies... but pls... pleaseee... you got to find the perfect "actor" for specific Epic story role man... like I say, you dont want to put Bruce Willis in " The Princess of Barbie World... or Stone Cold in " would you Like to Dance with me? "... cmon man... producers should think better. What else... hmmm... oh yea, the soundtrack... I mean, it could of been better... I felt like they were playing the same soundtrack the whooole time... nothing original... Look at Gladiator... there's a Nostalgic music when Russel Crow is dreaming... or when his family died... and when the Army Attacked the Barbarian at the beginning... or even when the king was killed by his son... you got to put a "proper" soundtrack or song for a specific moment man... I mean, the soundtrack they put in the fighting scene sound like The ARRIVING of BARNEY The DINO-WARRIOR... cmon man... seriously... the only place I loved most in this movie was the time Farmer (Jason)'s father died in the tent... THAT was good... why? Because of the script... the "feeling" the music behind it and what both of them said to each other in a " STAR WARS Darth Vader FINAL words to LUC before he pass away" scene alike made me feel sad... oh yea... I even had tears... now that was good. Thats what we look forward to in great actor... you got to look real man... if you cant cry... if cant be emotional... then you need to practice your craft til you learn to become a true actor... I mean, no disrespect to Jason Statham but... he needs to be more emotional when his son died... I mean, Jason is a serious dude and got no prob with that... but when your son or your wife dies... the reasons your living for man... you gotta cry... do what you got to to man... throw some garlic on your face or eat some as well... tell someone to kick you in the nuts... do something man!!! I mean... every one... every HUMAN would cry in these sad situation... its natural... oh well, that's just one little glitch I didint like... someone you love died and you dont react... thats weird... I wasnt even touched by his facial reaction to his son's grave. Oh well... that's Jason... or maybe its just the script (I guess it is... I HOPE it is...)what can I do... but if it was MEANT to be... I mean, to NOT cry and just to suddenly have the URGE of REVENGE and OUT OF CONTROL killing sensation... they could of at "leat" put some sort of music to make us feel that he's really in pain and angry and wants revenge big time like wanna kill everyone around... ya know... that aint hard to do... I mean I'm a Music Producer myself and I could of done much better for cheaper price for a good EVIL soundtrack revenge sort of... oh well... what else... oh yea... the ending... hehehe... wanna know why I'm laughint? Oh my lord... I wish I could tell you the ending... but I can only tell you this... C-H-E-E-S-Y... yup... at the end I was like... HUH? That's it? Lets go home now? Hahaha... youll see what I mean. Overall, I give 9 on 10 for Jason only... and 0.5 out of 10 for the Producer and script writters for not taking time to understand what a real Epic story is all about... it comes down to 5 on 10 as you can see. Do I type alot you say? Well my friends... it is for your own good. I know what I'm talking about cuz I watch more movies then anybody else on this planet. I watch everything from documentary to science fiction... to action packed, comedy, horror movies... I watch it all. I'm a movie fanatic. I bet you 1$ you'll come out of the theather and say..." Oh shoot... what that guy said on cinemamontreal was right..." then'll you'll probably start to laught like I did... enjoy this movie dear friends. Hmmm, I think it's worth to see... since there's nothing else good to watch nowadays since Lord of the ring and Spider man and Star Wars... nothing good at all. I hope to see another Star Wars episode in the futur before I die... Star Wars 4-5-6 rules all the way. ( I didint like Star Wars 1-2-3... too much computer animation... bad choice for new actor " talking about Samuel L. Jackson" in the role of Master Windou" he diddint belong in that movie man... and Anakin Skywalker in episode 2 and 3 was such a bad actor man I just wanted to Slap him. Oh well... peace.