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    The X-Files: I Want to Believe

    Reviewed by
    adamwatchesmovies@

    If you’re going to bring back a popular TV series by making a movie, you better be sure to pick a compelling story. If you don’t you’ll end up with something along the lines of “X-Files: I want to Believe”. What a wasted opportunity!

    It’s been years since Dr. Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson) has been with the FBI but the disappearance of a fellow agent forces her back into action. The bureau wants her to find disgraced agent Fox Mulder (David Duchovny) to help them out with this paranormal phenomenon. When another victim is abducted, it becomes obvious something is going on, but what? Could it be a strange cult? Aliens? Bigfoot? Only the dynamic duo of Agent Mulder and Scully can find out!

    There is nothing about this story that screams "movie". There aren’t any revelations that shake up the bureau and give concrete proof of some long-running plot points that were never solved, there aren’t any big sequences with splashy special effects, the subject matter isn’t particularly shocking and our main characters don’t evolve past what they were in the series. There aren’t any new characters introduced to bring new life into the series either, so what are we looking at? Nothing but a standard police/serial killer story with a couple of small things thrown in to spice things up. We’ve got Dr. Scully dealing with a sick kid who is under her care. He’s only got slim odds of making it out alive and damn it. Those kooks ready to just “leave him in God’s hands” or to pawn him off to another hospital where he can live out the rest of his days in comfort aren’t helping! Even the sole lead to what's going on, a repentant pedophile catholic priest isn’t enough to interest you. It’s another one of these cases where it takes forever for everyone to catch on to what’s happening. I don’t know about you, but the second someone bleeds from the eyes and points to the location of a needle in a haystack, I’ll believe whatever story they have.

    Normally I’d praise a film for having ample character development and subplots to flesh out the world they live in, but not here. It's due to the story’s conclusion. I’m not going to say what happens, but this is one of those movies that demands a sequel. Not the further adventures of Mulder and Scully, but a faux documentary where we get to see every single newspaper in the X-Files Universe stop their presses to print a new front page. When you find out what’s been going on, you want to see what kind of in-universe movies would get made with the tagline “Based on the true story that shocked the world”. In our world, the media turned Ed Gein into everything from Leatherface to Norman Bates. I can’t imagine what they would twist this tale into. I'd be dominating the news for at least a month! Of course, we’ll never get to see that story even though it’s far more interesting than this film.

    The revelations of what is going on are brought in right at the last moment and then go away quickly. This film feels like the first two parts of a three-part TV arc, with the final and most interesting chapter missing completely. Where are the court cases? Where are the explanations for how all of these people got roped into this ridiculous plot? Where’s the logic in not showing a story so crazy it would make everyone involved in it world famous? As I was watching the film, I was begging for some big development or revelation. I figured all of these only moderately interesting elements would all tie into something big but none of them do. It’s a titanic disappointment and not only because so little is explored here. This story is so nutty, it would fit right at home with clockwork Nazi assassins, extradimensional gods, and skeleton armies if you threw in Hellboy. Except Hellboy is awesome, this movie is not.

    If you’re a fan, you’ll be wondering why they picked this story to bring your favorite characters to the big screen. If you’re thinking this will get you into the series, it won't. The ending is so ridiculous and has so little payoff you’ll dismiss every season for being associated with this train wreck.

    I was really hoping to see something great but what I got made me disappointed, made me laugh in bewilderment and even made me a little angry. While it’s competently made and actually has a lot of good things going at first, not even Xzibit as an FBI agent could make “X-Files: I Want to Believe” into something worth your attention. (Extended Version on DVD, December 26, 2013)

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    adamwatchesmovies@  26.10.2016 age: 26-35 2,867 reviews

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